My mom (Grammie) is amazing. She left her life in Texas and came to live with us for 109 days! 15.5 weeks! 3.5 months!
She arrived a week and a half before Katie was born and left today, four weeks after Katie's surgery. I can't name all the ways she helped but here are a few. She learned our family's routine, our rules and expectations for Ellee, our schedule, how we play, what we eat, where everything goes, and fit within that life perfectly.
All the time that we were in the hospital for the birth and surgery, she was in charge of Ellee. Ellee had absolutely no trouble handling the transitions because my mom did everything as we would. Ellee continued to sleep and eat consistently, she remained calm and continued to follow the rules, and never felt left behind. Grammie was able to reassure her that Mike and I would be home as soon as we could and that Katie would be fine. Ellee was never once scared or afraid and never regressed in any way. The consistency my mom provided for Ellee was priceless.
In addition to providing consistency for Ellee, she pitched in wherever she could to help out. I had to recover from a c-section and feed Katie thoughout the night for the first two months. She would get up with Ellee in the mornings so Mike could go to work and I could sleep in after the long nights with Katie. We formed a great team where between the two of us we could play with Ellee, care for Katie and do all the other things around the house. At various times, she went grocery shopping, cooked, and cleaned. She played and read endlessly with Ellee, took her to school, to parks, to waterfalls. Bathed the girls, changed diapers, did laundry, dishes, and took out the trash.
During the months before and after Katie's surgery it was essential that Katie didn't get sick. We went into a form of isolation to protect Katie. We basically kept Ellee and Katie at home for two months. Ellee didn't go to preschool or any public place. Katie only went to her doctor appointments. Mike, Grammie, and I shared the tasks of watching the kids while the other adults could run the essential errands in public. It is very hard to keep a 3 year old confined in a three bedroom apartment for two months! My mom took up the challenge and found educational activities, toys, and crafts to keep Ellee active, thinking, and entertained.
We are blessed with a large number of family members and friends that could help us during this time. However, no one was in position to provide the long term consistency for the duration, except my mom. Grammie being here was the best thing for Ellee. Without her, Mike and I would have had to spend a large amount of time organizing our friends and family to come through in shifts to watch Ellee. We also had no idea before each hospitalization, how long we would be there. Did we need someone to watch Ellee for a few days, a week, two weeks, three? We could focus on Katie while we were in the hospital because we knew Ellee was taken care of.
Mike and I (with the help of others) could have managed these three months if she was unable to come for so long. However, it would have been much more stressful and a lot less graceful. We also had a bunch of fun! As you can imagine, sometimes a girl just needs her mom!
I also want to thank my dad...he went 3.5 months without his wife!
Your parents are awesome. Awesome.
ReplyDeleteThat is awesome! So glad you had that blessing. My mom made it out for two week then my sis and then my father in law with his wife. I'll tell ya the constant change wasn't great and only my mom was helpfull. The others just wanted to see the baby. :/
ReplyDelete